Rosaria Butterfield’s story is one of profound transformation, marked by intellectual rigor, spiritual searching, and the power of Christian hospitality. As a former English professor and lesbian activist, Butterfield’s journey to Christianity was anything but straightforward.
Her conversion, which she describes as a “train wreck” due to the upheaval it caused in her life, is a testament to the gentle yet radical grace of God. In her memoir, The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert: An English Professor’s Journey into Christian Faith, Butterfield recounts how she went from a life dedicated to progressive causes to one devoted to following Christ.
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An Intellectual and Activist Background
Rosaria Butterfield’s early life was defined by academia and activism. As a professor of English and women’s studies at Syracuse University, she specialized in feminist and queer theory. She was deeply involved in LGBTQ+ advocacy, viewing Christianity as an obstacle to progress and a source of oppression. Butterfield’s identity and intellectual pursuits were intertwined with her activism, and she considered herself a staunch opponent of traditional Christian values.
In the 1990s, Butterfield began researching and writing critically about the Christian right. She was working on a project to expose what she saw as the dangers of Christianity’s influence on public life. During this time, she wrote an article criticizing the evangelical movement, which led to an unexpected response that would change her life.
The Power of Hospitality and Kindness
After publishing her article, Butterfield received a large volume of mail, both positive and negative. Among the responses was a letter from a local pastor, Ken Smith, who politely challenged her presuppositions about Christianity. Instead of reacting with hostility, Smith extended an invitation for Butterfield to visit his home and discuss her views further over a meal.
Smith’s approach was notable for its warmth and lack of an agenda. He did not aim to convert her immediately or confront her beliefs head-on. Instead, he and his wife opened their home to Butterfield, engaging her in honest conversations about faith, life, and worldview. This act of hospitality became a crucial turning point in her spiritual journey.
This act of hospitality became a crucial turning point in her spiritual journey.
Butterfield describes this period of her life as one of deep intellectual engagement. She began reading the Bible in earnest, not as a religious text to be critiqued, but as a book that might have something to say about her own life and the world. Over time, her discussions with Pastor Smith and her study of Scripture started to unravel the worldview she had held for so long.
A Gradual, Painful Conversion
Butterfield’s conversion was not a sudden or emotional event. It was a slow, agonizing process of re-evaluating her beliefs, identity, and lifestyle. She struggled deeply with what embracing Christianity would mean for her, personally and professionally. In The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert, Butterfield writes about how painful it was to walk away from the life she had built, knowing that her decision would alienate her from the academic and activist communities she had been part of for years.
She refers to her conversion as a “train wreck” because of the personal cost it required. Accepting Christ as her Savior meant letting go of her identity as she had known it—her career, her relationships, and her sense of self. But in doing so, she discovered a new identity in Christ, one that was not rooted in her past but in the transformative grace of God.
A New Life in Christ
After her conversion, Butterfield left her teaching position and her previous life behind. She eventually married a pastor and became a mother, living a life dramatically different from the one she had known. Butterfield has since become a Christian speaker and author, sharing her testimony to encourage others and to challenge both Christians and non-Christians to think deeply about faith, identity, and the call of Christ.
In The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert, Butterfield reflects on the profound impact that Christian hospitality had on her journey. Pastor Smith’s willingness to engage her with kindness and without an agenda was instrumental in breaking down the barriers she had built against Christianity. She emphasizes that it was not an argument or a debate that won her over, but the love of Christ displayed through the patient and compassionate actions of His people.
The Role of the Bible
A key aspect of Butterfield’s conversion was her engagement with the Bible. As an academic, she approached the Scriptures initially with skepticism, viewing them through the lens of literary critique. However, as she studied the Bible more deeply, she was struck by its coherence, its power, and its ability to speak directly to her heart.
Romans 1, in particular, played a significant role in her journey. The chapter’s discussion of sin and idolatry confronted her with the reality of her own condition. For Butterfield, the Bible was not just a text to be analyzed but a living Word that convicted her of her sin and pointed her toward the redemption offered in Christ.
A Call to Radical Hospitality
In her post-conversion life, Butterfield has become a passionate advocate for Christian hospitality. She believes that one of the most powerful ways Christians can engage with those who hold different beliefs is by inviting them into their lives—just as Pastor Smith did with her. This kind of hospitality, which is not driven by an immediate agenda to convert but by a genuine love for others, can open doors for meaningful conversations and relationships.
Butterfield challenges Christians to see hospitality as central to their witness. In her view, it is through building relationships, not winning arguments, that people can experience the love of Christ in tangible ways.
Conclusion: A Life Transformed
Rosaria Butterfield’s story is a powerful testimony to the transformative grace of God and the power of Christian hospitality. Her journey from being an outspoken critic of Christianity to a devoted follower of Christ is a reminder that no one is beyond the reach of God’s love.
Her life exemplifies the importance of engaging others with kindness, patience, and humility. It was through the simple yet profound act of hospitality that she encountered the Gospel in a way that ultimately led to her conversion. Today, Butterfield’s story continues to inspire countless others to consider the claims of Christ and the radical transformation that comes through following Him.
As Butterfield reflects in her book, “I wasn’t converted out of homosexuality. I was converted out of unbelief.” Her testimony is a reminder that at the heart of the Christian faith is not merely a change in behavior, but a change in heart—a transformation from darkness to light, from unbelief to faith, and from self-reliance to total dependence on Christ.
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